Do you ever get the feeling that you never quite measure up to the standard that someone else has set? It can be very frustrating. We look around and see people who have achieved such great things in their professional lives, in their family lives, and in their spiritual lives, and we’re left feeling very inadequate. Or maybe it’s others who make the comparison and make us feel that way. They are always telling us how we don’t measure up to the former person in that same position.
This article is about the sin of comparison. Counselors struggle with this just as much as anyone else. How many cases do you have per week? The pastor asked me to take this case, but he didn’t ask you. Why are all their cases going so well and all of my cases going so badly?
Why don’t we look at the interaction that took place between Jesus’ ministry and the ministry of John the Baptist to help you stop comparing yourself with others and instead be what God has called you to be—in His strength and for His glory?
The Ministry of John and Jesus Overlapped (John 3:22-24)
Jesus had been in the city of Jerusalem for Passover. He had already cleansed the temple once. He had made His presence known to the Jews. He had made Himself known to the Pharisees. Jesus is now out away from Jerusalem, and He and His disciples are not in the Judean countryside.
Here, Jesus “remained there with them and was baptizing…” The word “remain there” means “to remain or stay in a place.” Jesus wasn’t just blowing through town; He was spending quality time with these people. This phrase gives rise to the idea that Jesus was talking with the people. I believe He was teaching the people. I think He was preaching to the people. He is the Good Shepherd, and He was with His flock. He is the leader of Israel, and He was accessible to His people.
Verse 22 also says that He was “baptizing.” Now, according to John 4:2, Jesus was not personally doing the baptizing, but He had delegated this special service to His disciples. So we may ask, what was John the Baptist doing as Jesus was starting His public ministry?
John 3:23 says, “John also was baptizing at Aenon near Salim because water was plentiful there, and people were coming and being baptized.”
Both John’s ministry and Jesus’ ministry were involved in baptism. So, what is John doing now that Jesus has started his ministry? John the Baptist is continuing his ministry. Mark 1:2-8 summarizes John the Baptist’s ministry. I love this description of John the Baptist. He went against the mold. He went against the grain. He was unconventional. He was totally obedient. He was Spirit-led. He was living an abundant and radical life for Christ and for the Gospel.
Now that we have seen that the ministry of Jesus and John the Baptist overlapped, let’s move on to our second point.
The Jealousy of John’s Disciples (John 3:25-26)
This whole idea of Jesus’ ministry and John’s ministry overlapping leads to this “discussion” or debate between some of John’s disciples and a certain Jew. In fact, the word “discussion” means “a controversy” or “an engagement in a controversial discussion, debate, or argument.”
In other words, this interaction was starting to get heated. It is very possible that this Jew wants to be baptized, but he is not sure who to go to. Should I go to Jesus, or should I go to John the Baptist? Is Jesus’ baptism better than John’s baptism? John’s disciples are fired up about this. Is he doing something right, and are we doing something wrong? How is He having better results than us?
Jesus and His ministry are cranking out bigger numbers than John and his ministry. The momentum has officially shifted. It used to be all about John’s ministry, and people were leaving town and coming out into the wilderness to hear John’s preaching. Now, they are coming to hear Jesus.
What happened? What happened to John? Did he lose his mojo? Did he lose his swagger? Did he lose his passion? Did he lose his effectiveness?
How did John the Baptist’s disciples respond to all this? Did they send the other ministry a note of congratulations and some flowers? Did they send them an email saying, “We are really proud of you guys; you are taking on a lot. Can we help?”
No. Instead, they get jealous. And as they get jealous, they begin to compare, then they start to compete, and then they begin to feel insecure. By the way, isn’t this exactly how we respond in our own flesh?
Did you notice their emotions and their language? They say, “Look he is baptizing, and all are going to Him” (John 3:26b). Really? Is everyone really going to see him? Look, John, you embraced this guy and now everyone is going to see him. This is exaggeration and inflation.
We exaggerate things, we inflate things, we over-react. And that’s what John’s disciples are doing here in this verse. Here is what went wrong with these guys. They misplaced their value. They began to view their value and their worth to God as being based on their performance instead of on the fact that they are image-bearers and ambassadors for the Almighty God.
They began to place their dignity on their ministry’s success. And so, when the ministry began to suffer a little bit, their pride got hurt, and they began to over-react. When their success is threatened, they feel that their value is being threatened as well. They began to compare, they began to compete, and then they became insecure and irrational. However, don’t we do the same thing?
When we value ourselves based on our own accomplishments, it really makes it difficult to rejoice with those around us who are experiencing success when we are not. When our success begins to be eclipsed by others, we begin to feel insecure and lash out. Have you been in that situation?
Have you ever lived a season in the spotlight, and all of a sudden you got moved to the shadows? How did that work out for you? How did you respond? How did that make you feel? What went on in your heart?
The way we react when we feel overlooked and are out of the spotlight will be a great indicator of where we find our value.
Listen to me. We all struggle with this. You are not alone. Let’s stop debating whose ministry is better, and let’s instead rejoice with those around us who are experiencing God’s blessing in ministry!
At the heart of this issue is the sin of comparison.
Our hearts are full of covetousness, jealousy, and greed. However, if our value is in God and not in our popularity as a person, or as a couple, or as a church, then we don’t have to be threatened by other people.
The desire to have more, the desire to do more, the desire to be the best-known, the desire to be liked, and the desire to be in the limelight is functional slavery.
Can I just remind you today that life is not an audition? You are not on trial. You are not here to determine your value, your worth, or your dignity—that has been given to you by God! You have nothing to prove.
The Illustration of John the Baptist (John 3:29)
Life is not about you. Everything is about Jesus. As we examine this verse, I want you to ask yourself, “Is my life about me, or is my life about Jesus?” Here, in verse 29, we understand that the church is Jesus’ bride, not yours. Remember, this is John’s response to his disciples as they work through the tension in their own hearts, feeling insecure and jealous of Jesus and His disciples.
John says, “The one who has the bride, is the bridegroom…” So, here we see clearly that Jesus is the bridegroom, and the church is the bride. But we also see “The friend of the bridegroom is mentioned…” That’s John the Baptist—and that’s you and me. We have a part to play in the work of redemption, but it is not the center stage. We have a part to play in the game of life, but you are not Michael Jordan; you’re only Scotty Pippin at best!
You are not the bridegroom; you are the bridegroom’s friend, or in today’s terminology, you are the best man in the wedding.
The best man is to act on behalf of the bridegroom and make the preliminary arrangements for the ceremony. The best man is also responsible for attending to the bride and ensuring she has everything she needs before the bridegroom arrives. The best man’s joy increases when he hears the bridegroom coming for his bride.
The best man is not to take center stage, he is not to steal the show, and he is not to ever, ever, ever run off with the bride. May God help you kill the sin of comparison and instead cultivate a heart of humility and service, expecting nothing in return because the promotion of and satisfaction with the glory of Christ is our greatest good.
For an additional resource on comparison, see Adam Tyson’s breakout session, The Sin of Comparison, from the 2024 ACBC Annual Conference.
