Where do we look to find needed refuge in the storms of life? How do we mine the sufficient truth throughout Scripture and apply it to the trials and questions plaguing our hearts? Both of these questions have answers, but sometimes we need guidance to find those and apply them—especially in times of suffering.
We begin with reorienting our thinking (Romans 12:1-2). Scripture has to be the truth that informs our experiences. Fallen experience cannot substitute for the truth of Scripture and how it instructs us of our fallen condition. When experiences become our truth-sayer, deceit, confusion, and lies distort God’s truth and His purposes in our suffering.
Recently, the city of Pacific Palisades, CA, was overtaken by fire, spreading across LA County and affecting the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. Many have lost everything—homes, livelihoods, memories—leaving only apocalyptic shadows of ruin, rubble, chaos, and confusion. Some have lost loved ones while others are still searching for them.
Tragic loss disrupts the ballast of stability even for believers. Shock, numbness, grief, and despair overwhelm. Anger and regret often follow, producing real questions that are desperate for answers.
One common question in suffering is “Why?” It was Job’s question for over 40 chapters until he surrendered those questions to “Who.” We can learn that it is human to wrestle with “why” and that it is not sinful, for God knows our frame (Psalm 103:14). The next question often becomes, “Now what?”
No Victims in His Plan
As biblical counselors, we have the answers to those questions in God’s sufficient Word. But how we minister those truths is pivotal. Jesus always had perfect timing and tempo when He spoke truth. Jesus’ perfect balance also had a perfect goal, a telos: redemption over mere relief. We will need to emulate Jesus’ example of timing and truth to be effective in building hope in those who find themselves lacking in hope.
We can’t sidestep tragedy but must frame suffering in the context of God’s sovereignty. There are no victims in His plan. We need to help our counselees embrace their “ever-present” Savior as both their refuge and strength (Psalm 46:1). Victimhood mentality is an understandable yet flesh-driven response to comprehending suffering. God is sovereign over every moment of our lives, including the pain, the catastrophes, and the sorrow (Job 2:10; Ecclesiastes 7:14).
Ministering Truth with Presence and Compassion
Those we minister to will need help to take one rung of truth at a time as they, with God’s help, climb out of the dark pit of hopelessness and despair. In times of suffering, our thinking and our emotions can take captive what is true.
Ministry includes acknowledging loss and ministering to physical needs. Once again, our sufficient Scriptures give us a perfect picture of what it looks like to minister to the exhausted and despairing. Elijah needed his physical needs tended to as his fears and weariness fueled his despair. With his hope shattered, discouraged, afraid, and in great distress, Elijah, in his desperation, asked the Lord to give him death (1 Kings 19:4). Yet in his overwhelmed state, God provided food and drink and rest. It was after this rest that God began to speak to him. Timing and truth have a cadence in how we care for others.
Joy and grief can co-exist amidst the rubble of despair. They are not mutually exclusive. Paul exemplified this tension in Philippians 4:11, demonstrating God’s provision of strength to face “whatever circumstances” God ordains for our lives. This truth requires both a supernatural power—both to carry us and to mend our brokenness as we surrender our fears and losses to Him.
As we seek divine wisdom in the tempo of care, we also need to arm ourselves with biblical truth our counselees need to hear and rehearse. God chose to use words to communicate the most important truth of all time, the Bible. Our words must communicate those truths as well, even when it might be hard for them to hear as we are sensitive to balancing truth and care.
Directing Hearts to the God of Hope
Hope has to be anchored to the God of hope (Romans 15:13), not our circumstances. Those suffering need the “with-ness” of others—a lifeline of comfort and care from the body of Christ. This “with-ness” is an expression of “one anothering,” requiring time, sacrifice, and persistent prayer. Encourage counselees to reconnect with community through worship, small groups, and service. Though initially difficult, these connections are part of God’s provision.
Be a good student of their suffering. Listen to their words. Learn what Bible stories mean the most to them and help them expand on the truths in those stories. Build on the passages of Scripture that have already gained access to hearts and their needs.
One of my favorite passages of Scripture is “The Road to Emmaus,” found in Luke 24:13-51. It recounts Jesus’ encounter with two friends who had just left Jerusalem after His resurrection. Confused and unsettled, they didn’t recognize Him because He had not yet revealed Himself to them. Fully aware of their dilemma, Jesus knew they needed to be reminded of the truth of Scripture. Hopeless and disheartened, they said, “We were hoping that it was He who was going to redeem Israel” (Luke 24:21).
Jesus revealed the root of their hopelessness: their failure to see Him as He truly is. He reframed their confusion by reminding them of what the Old Testament prophesied about Him—what is true and sure, even when life feels chaotic. While “with” them, Jesus spoke truth to their fears, ate with them, and finally revealed Himself. When their eyes were opened, they exclaimed, “Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road, while He was explaining the Scriptures to us?” (Luke 24:32, NASB). The word “burning” in Greek, kaiō, means to be kindled, burn, or flame.
John MacArthur, in his commentary on this passage, writes: “The story of this encounter may be viewed from three perspectives: the need for understanding, the source of understanding, and response to understanding.”1MacArthur, John, The Macarthur New Testament Commentary, Luke 18-24, Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2014, p, 419. These provide a helpful framework for addressing pain and suffering, guiding counselees to respond in ways that glorify God. We need to carefully minister the sufficient and perfect Word of God to the hurting and hopeless, carefully balancing tempo and truth. By emulating our Savior’s counsel, our counselee’s hearts and hopes can be stirred with new hope and purpose to live based on a biblical understanding of their trials and the encouragement they need to endure (Hebrews 12:1-3; I Thessalonians 1:3). How we counsel is a testimony to our own theology.
Suffering counselees need help keeping Christ and His Word as their eternal, indestructible hope, and a living refuge that can never be taken from them. Ministering to those in the midst of grief requires more than brief words of encouragement. Counseling in these scenarios demands long suffering, both for the counselee and the counselor. This is where we go the distance, as God’s timeline for sanctification may look different than ours.
Ultimately, Christ’s steadfast love is the source of our counsel and care. We are merely instruments in the Redeemer’s hands when we point others to Him who is the Wonderful Counselor (Isaiah 9:6). As we walk alongside those who are suffering, being mindful of both tempo and truth, we faithfully minister His truth with patience, helping them see His hand at work, even in their darkest trials. He alone brings beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3). He works through us to remind them of their source of comfort and the purposes He ordains in our pain (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
